With friends like you, who needs enemies??

#6 Fair Weather Friends

Depending on how you look at it, I have been fortunate and unfortunate in my "friend" history.  All of my friends have taught me something important, some vital life lesson.  Who to trust, who not to...who I can rely on no matter what and who I should never expect to be there for me when I need them.  As I reflect back and think about all the people, I have at one point or another, referred to as a friend, I am ashamed.  Disappointed in myself that I let jackasses like that into my life.  Two faced bitches that don't know the meaning of loyalty or support.  I can't even count the secrets I have shared with these people, and have turned around and blabbed to the first person that would listen.  This is the exact reason I have always chose to be friends with males instead of females...girls have big fat mouths.  You can't trust them with anything, especially with secrets.  However, I have found that guys are no better.  They might be able to keep secrets better than girls, but they are master players.  Tricksters.  Manipulative bastards.  They will do and say just about anything to get into your panties.  Tell you you are pretty just so they can have a shag.  When I think about all the drama they cause, I remember and understand why i was a serial dater for such a long time.  I had/have such serious trust issues with men, and my current situation with my "best friend" just validates my beliefs.  I would LOVE to be the bigger person and say "I hope he finds what he's looking for, I hope he's happy".  But today, I just hope that he is miserable.  I hope his boots find that one uneven crack in the sidewalk and he falls to his ass, bruising his gigantic ego! ASS-HAT!

Bad Boys, Bad Boys...

As I was driving to work today I realized that maybe, JUST MAYBE, I have a road rage problem. I think everybody has it from time to time, sometimes its a little problem and sometimes its enough to make you want to pull out a gun and chase them down.  Today, I dealt with the latter...and I don't even have a gun.

#5

Pedal Pushing Peckerheads

I will be the first to admit that I have broken the law and sped more than a few times. HOWEVER, I don't think I have ever been going the speed limit, gotten behind another car and floored it.  I was going somewhere between 75 and 80 and this ding dong behind me, and quite a ways back I might add, comes flying up my a$$!  He had to have been going over 90.  Old dude in a rather delicious looking orange 2011 Camaro, (lucky bastard)...need I say more?!  What is it with men? Do they have female driver radar? Do they know that I'm already having a crappy day and the last thing I need is some tool thinking he owns the road?! *shakes my head*

Where's a cop when you need em?!



Einstein knew a thing or two...

He said this..."Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."
This might be a sore subject to some, it might offend or piss off.  But OH WELL!!! Here goes....

#4

Illiterate Jack-Asses!

Yes I realize that "illiterate" might be taking it too far.  Webster defines it as a person that cannot read or write.  My use of the word is slightly different.  It can also mean ignorant, unlearned and just plain uneducated.  Everyday at my job, I talk to people. (as I'm sure you do as well) I talk to fellow employees, customers that come in, customers that call and anybody in between.  It never ceases to amaze me that certain people have gotten this far in life knowing as little as they do.  I understand that education is not so important in some cultures, or is too expensive.  Blah Blah Blah!  How do you expect to get a GOOD job, keep said job, AND excel or move up in the world if you cannot speak correctly?!  Of course in my situation, not only am I dealing with ill educated people, I am also dealing with, well, lets just say "people that don't speak English".  I had a conversation the other day with a friend about how when Americans visit Italy, China or wherever, we are expected to learn at least some of their native language.  Simple things like, "where is the bathroom?" RIGHT?! Yet the south of the border dwellers don't.  Just doesn't make sense to me. Anywhoo...getting back to my original thought.  Here is a list of words or phrases that just chap my hide, get my goat, and just piss me the hell off!

1. Irregardless....NOT A WORD!

2. Alright....also, NOT A WORD!

3. Subposebly (see, I can't even spell it because IT IS NOT A WORD)

4. Once and a while....should be Once IN a while!

5. I could care less...."If you are capable of caring less, then please, do so. But if you don’t and can’t care anymore, the correct phrase should be “I couldn’t care less.”

And I think....

That.

Is.

All.

Buh-Bye now.



He laughs at your incorrect use of the English language.



B-B-B-Benny and the Jets...

Well, here it is Mom. I told you I'd do it, and I finally am. This next infuriating act is one that has bothered me since I was very young.  Not only does it bother me, it makes me want to get violent.

#3
Singing the wrong words!!!

I know, I know, not everyone has a perfect memory like myself (haspaceha) and simply cannot remember every word to every song.  Yet for some reason you still choose to sing the song, WITH the wrong words.  Its kinda like that saying, "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all".  IF YOU DON'T KNOW THE DANG WORDS, DON'T SING THE DANG SONG!!  Lyrics were written the way they were, for a reason.  "Paint It Blue" and "Welcome to My Jungle" just don't mean as much. Which is why I and others (only the ones with a good memory) sing the lyrics they do today.  Songs were meant to mean something and only do if we sing the RIGHT words! So please people, listen to the words, and if you can't understand what the artist is saying, GOOGLE THAT $***!!!!

*BLECH*

Okay, so this next thing that "gets my goat" is not really a big deal to most people. HOWEVER, this blog is all about the things that bug the you know what out of me, more than the regular person.

#2
Peanut Butter Spoons
If you have never encountered such a thing, you are lucky! I HATE it when I am doing dishes and someone (I won't name names) has put a spoon or knife in the sink with peanut butter still on it! It disgusts me to no end. It smells HORRIBLE and it sucks trying to get it off without really rubbing it....then my hands smell like peanut butter for the next few hours. I have tried to get my family to rinse them off before putting them in the sink to fester for the next 3 days (yes, sometimes it takes me that long to do the dishes) but they refuse! Which only proves my point. They don't like doing it, why should I???

"That's an interesting development"

While at the grocery store last night with my husband, I whined to him about how irritating it was when people come in through the "exit" and go out the "enter".  We laughed and I jokingly told him that I should start a blog about all the things that piss me off.  The more I thought about it, the more I absolutely LOVED the idea!  Anyone that knows me, knows that I have a lot of little quirks, lots of little things that bug the crap out of me...more than the normal person.  This blogs purpose is basically to catalog all my issues (LOL).  It will be uncensored and will hopefully make you giggle once or twice. Stay tuned for the wacky world of me...

#1 (as mentioned above)

Not obeying signage.

WHY IN THE HECK do stores like Walmart, Albertsons and just about every other retail establishment bother with installing "enter" and "exit" signs when NOBODY does what it is the sign is telling us to do?!  There is a reason ya know!...leaving the store would be so much easier if I didn't have to go against the flow of 'traffic'. Is it laziness? Rebellion??  I just don't get it!  Also, when I'm coming out of the store, usually with a cart full of spoils, the very wiiiiide woman coming towards me gives me a scowl and growls at me when I don't move out of HER way! Forget greeters, Walmart needs traffic cops!!...Complete with orange vests and maybe even those flashlight thingies they use at the airport. Come on people!!! PAY ATTENTION!